Life

Halfway Out of the Dark

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So the winter solstice was last night at 12 minutes to midnight, Eastern (my time zone). That makes today the shortest day of the year. We’re half way out of the dark, as a writer for Doctor Who put it a couple of years back, a line nicely delivered by Matt Smith.

Half way out of the dark.

As I get older, that seems to matter more. I’m not saying I have Seasonal Affective Disorder (or that I don’t), but I do tend to be an introspective person and that certainly seems to get stronger in the winter. My family might be able to tell you if I’m moodier or not.

I’m not much into winter sports (or sports in general), either to watch or play, though I don’t mind being out in the snow for a walk, especially if there’s geocaching involved and it’s not too cold. But I’d probably be happy if I lived somewhere the temperature always ranged between 5 and 20 degrees celsius (much more than that is too hot). Other than potentially increased family time because no one else likes to go outside when it’s cold, there’s not much to make me more or less happy with the season.

I kind of vaguely remember liking winter as a kid, in small doses at least. That lasted into my teen years so long as we continued to have snowball fights or wars. Not so keen on the shoveling or the cold or the having to catch my bus in the dark or having it bring me home in the dark. These days, it’s not so much that I’m not keen on the shoveling and the cold and the dark. It’s winter. I live in Canada. So long as the shoveling and cold and dark don’t have much of an impact on my life and the things I need to get done for my family, I’m pretty much indifferent to them.

Or I’d like to think I am.

Except, I find myself thinking about everything more in the winter, when it’s colder and darker. Past, present, and future. Missed opportunities plans that haven’t come to fruition yet. Hopes and dreams and fears.

Is that what winter does to us? To me?

Maybe it just brings out a deeper version of who I really am. Or maybe it makes me more introspective than is good for me.

But I did just remember I haven’t emptied the gas from the lawnmower yet, so that’s something. And solstice does mean that we’re only three months from the spring equinox, which starts my favourite season, and that’s something, too.

Be well, everyone.

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