What does Halloween mean when your kids are all adults?
When the average age on your stretch of neighbourhood is past retirement?
When we’re in the middle of a global pandemic and a lot of what makes Halloween fun for kids is a lot harder to manage?
When you’re fed up with the commercialization of absolutely everything?
Well, in our case, it means Star Trek themed cocktails and stand-up comedy on a convenient streaming service while downstairs my daughters and two friends have non-Star Trek themed cocktails and play cards against humanity while no kids come to the door for the limited supply of Candy we laid in just in case we had trick or treaters.
Our record in the 18 Halloweens we’ve lived in this house has been about 30 kids. Usually, it’s under 20. This year, I think we had 5.
And yeah, the commercialization of everything annoys me more every year. So I participate less every year. Halloween is a mild exception to that. If we have candy, and you come to the door having made some effort to dress up, you get candy. I don’t much care how old you are. Think you’re a little too old to dress up for Halloween? You get candy. Teenager trying to hold onto your youth and your costume was thrown together at the last second? You get candy. Coming up on 40 and candy is the only thing that keeps you from deciding life isn’t worth living? You get candy.
I don’t care.
But I’m not buying all of the crap and scattering it all over my house and my lawn.
Or for Christmas or any other holiday.
Whole industries exist built around trying to sell me junk I don’t need for holidays that are either made up or don’t need decorations or gifts involved. Which is all of them, really.
But if you want some candy, dress up and stop by on Halloween. I’ve got you covered.
For as long as the candy lasts or until around 930.
Stay safe and be well, everyone.by